Redesigning Alliances


A few weeks after Chris and I got married, I turned to him and said, “This isn’t working for me.” He fearfully asked, “What’s not working?” I said, “I can’t cook dinner every night while working full-time.” He quickly reminded me that I jumped into our marriage with his three sons and had taken over meals on my own. “Oh, you’re right,” I replied. “Well, let’s change that. Do you want every other week or every other day?” In coaching, we call this “designing an alliance.” Or in my case, redesigning an alliance. As many of us enter month six of working from home, it seems like a good a time to ask: What adjustments do I need to make to sustain this way of life? What alliances need to be redesigned—at home and at work? I’m asking my clients these questions: What's working well? What's not working? What needs to be different? There’s no need to settle for the status quo. Take a hard look at your life and decide what you would like to redesign. Let me know what changes you'll be making. And, in case you’re wondering, Chris and I still (mostly) share dinner responsibilities 22 years later.